No, but seriously?: Toledo Edition.

The game in text messages…

Tim: oh fuck
Paul: we can spot the rockets 7… right?
Tim: if we cant… kill me.
Paul: after this drive, ill decide whether to prep the CN^4
Paul: is warren dinged up? and finally the minor seam works
Tim: hes been near hurt most of the season
Paul: also… michigan fans really, really, really, really suck
Tim: they are sub sufficient
Paul: ive caled one a dumbass and argued with about 3 more
Paul: im going to get in a fight with someobne. its inevitabl. why wouldn’t you run on 2nd and 20 with 10 secs left?
Paul: so you try a bomb with a qb who has already thrown one pick6 and tried to throw another?
Tim: toe fuckledo
Paul: ruck the fockets!
Paul: and we got rick roll’d
Tim: obvs. kill me now
Paul: is it better than the m offense has scored all 17 points this game?
Tim: better, yet simultaneously much, much worse. i think.
Paul: they’ve only scored 3 on the michigan defense
Tim: they are also toledo. im just sayin
Paul: omg! first down! fire shaffer!
Nate: it is sad. for the world
Tim: remember how sheridan is terrible? shit…
Paul: sheridamnit?
Tim: pretty much
Paul: CONER!!!
Tim: put in the competent qb plz
Paul: i wouldn’t mind seeing threet, odoms, mathews, warren, and/or graham
Paul:this seems eerily similar to appy. except both teams are much worse
Tim: remember how sheridan suxzzz? me2.
Paul: hes like pat white with a much worse arm/less running ability/no melanin and better hair
Tim: way better hair. unfortunately, hair != skill
Paul: id take opelt :(
Paul: mind lasers. please. we need an inexplicable mistake on their part
Tim: tom hammond save us all
Paul: all hail hammond! & zoltan…
Paul: mmb should learn yakety sax
Tim: no but we’re srsly going to lose to fuckin toledo
Paul: ast time you said that we lost to appy! jinxer!
Paul: i think this proves sheridan to clemons is not effective
Tim: sheridan to X is generally terrible. mostly on account of the sheridan factor
Paul: bye bye motor city bowl
Tim: i might puke
Paul: can we pretend toledo is in CUSA or something?
Tim: beat the fucking nittany lions
Tim: maybe we can win the tears of infinite sadness award this week.

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2 Comments so far

  1. Anonymous says...

    I am not diving on the “Fuck, fire Rich loser I hate him” bandwagon, but there is no reason why we lost to Toledo. Perhaps we over-evaluated how easy it is to stomp the Big East? Maybe he is not the coach we thought he was… I don’t know what to think right now. Today it is not great to be a Michigan Wolverine.

  2. UofMSnowboarder says...

    Are you going to post the glorious comments of Rick Moranis?

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